A couple weeks ago, I wrote a post on chivalry and I’m not taking any of that back. I just feel like I need to clarify a couple things after tonight’s little fix it yourself vacuum project.
I completely believe in chivalry. I think it’s great and right and what should happen. Ladies, pay attention. Here it comes. Are you ready for it??? BUT, just because a guy goes out of his way to do things for you and treats you well, doesn’t give you the right to become a baby again. You had that chance a long time ago. That’s right I said it. Chivalry doesn’t make it OK to be helpless.
I’m all for the guy being there to help with certain things, but you shouldn’t rely on him for everything. Yes, he is your strong companion there to protect you and care for you but that doesn’t mean you can act like a dumb ditz. No one likes that. Maybe I’m the only one that feels this way, but I think it’s important for us girls to be able to take care of ourselves. Same with the men out there.
Girls, teach your guys how to do the laundry without ruining your clothes. Wash dishes or load the dishwasher. Sew a button on. Cook your favorite dish. Cook any dish for that matter. Iron a shirt properly. Bake a killer batch of cookies (we all know they eat most of them anyway).
Men, teach your lady to fix things. Unclog the drains. Change a tire. Check the oil. Get dirty. Fix a leaky pipe. Take care of the lawn. Grill something. Start a fire. Teach her how to throw for goodness sakes! Frisbees, baseball, footballs. Shoot some hoops. Operate some power tools (cue Tim the Tool Man Taylor’s grunt).
I’m not saying that you completely switch roles now. That’s not cool either. I’m just saying that if either of you are unavailable for any reason, y’all can get stuff done. Men, they may still have you kill the spider and women, you’ll get your chance to nurture them while their sick. The roles aren’t changing…but the playing field is being leveled just a bit. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help, but if you’re significant other does this stuff for you every. single. time, that’s lame. Do it yourself! The feeling of accomplishment after completing one of these tasks is pretty awesome if I do say so myself.
I had a wonderful example of this at my house growing up. Personally, I think it’s great, and I for one would love my future husband to be the same way. My dad always did the dishes after supper. He was always in there. No matter what was on TV at the time, he would help my mom out in this way. He does laundry…it may not be my mother’s favorite thing for him to step up and do, but I appreciate the effort Dad! He can sew on a button or fix a pair of dress pants if need be. I’ve been told he can make some mean 4H blue-ribbon brownies. He sings. He can play what he needs on the piano without having to call my mom over. Oh, he also makes some killer homemade ice cream!
Basically, it all comes down to service. My father is an amazing example of a servant. Isn’t that what a partnership is all about anyway? Two-way, compromise, I love you so I will do this to help you kind of things. Chivalry works both ways ladies and gentlemen. You go out of your way to open the door for your girl and she goes out of her way to make your favorite dessert for her main man. You like them. Love them. Care about them. You don’t do it to get something out of the deal, but because you want to make someone’s life easier by doing this task for them. It’s a sacrifice that should be done out of love, not the expectation of a reward.